Have you ever felt so angry with a dear friend or family member that you`ve seriously thought about breaking off any kind of communication with them? Relationships are always at least slightly complicated and for a number of reasons. Recently, I have had a very big falling out with my younger brother, who lives in London, and it makes me sad to think that our freindship is in such a bad way. I want to try to understand how things have become so bad between us and I can identify at least 3 causes of tension between friends and loved ones.
One reason is definitely jealousy. For example, maybe one brother thinks that the relationship between another brother and their mother or father is too close. Perhaps they feel guilty that, for various reasons, they haven`t spent enough time with their parents and are angry with their sibling because of the fact that they have. Jealousy can also come from other sources, for example a sibling who has more money, a bigger car, or a better job. Jealousy is a very powerful force, but it isn`t the only reason why a relationship can go sour.
Another is the fact that people change. Like it or not, even if two brothers or sisters have the same parents, background, schooling, and upbringing, more often than not, their values will differ. This can be due to different life experiences, coupled with already disparate personalities. This is very true for my brother and I. Our paths have diverged since we were about 22, just after university. I started to travel and see the world while my brother settled down, got married and started a family. He has had a very successful career in London and, although we look very similar, our personalities are so different.
Finally, I think that a persons husband, wife, or partner can have a very strong influence on the realtionship that person has with his or her family members. This can be positive or negative, or a mixture of both. When a person marries someone or starts living with them as husband and wife, it`s inevitable that things will change, for better or worse. This has been the case with my brother.
i feel very sad at the moment as I hate confrontation and I know my brother loves me. However, he`s upset me deeply and I`m not sure how to mend things. I hope to come to some solution to this problem soon.